- 1 Matt is an Apex legend. His boxing and swordfighting skills were foretold eons ago. He has clapped the cheeks of 23 and 26 year old people indiscriminately. His beard is actually sharpie. Hair is too scared to be on his face. Matt being a gay furry pornstar who has had sex with millions of purple turtles was a joke that was never meant to be taken seriously. Matt is almighty and all-seeing as the ruler of Wuhu Island, but he still respects others religions and beliefs. Unless they oppose him, in which case he kills them instantly. Go Check out David Failburg's page and comment on it.
Matt is an Apex legend. His boxing and swordfighting skills were foretold eons ago. He has clapped the cheeks of 23 and 26 year old people indiscriminately. His beard is actually sharpie. Hair is too scared to be on his face. Matt being a gay furry pornstar who has had sex with millions of purple turtles was a joke that was never meant to be taken seriously. Matt is almighty and all-seeing as the ruler of Wuhu Island, but he still respects others religions and beliefs. Unless they oppose him, in which case he kills them instantly. Go Check out David Failburg's page and comment on it.[edit | edit source]
In Wii Sports[edit | edit source]
In tennis[edit | edit source]
Matt does not play tennis but instead participates in ass-eating contests with Amy. One time, he ate so many asses that 8 people were left in comas, 13 left with internal bleeding, and the annual ass-eating contest had to be delayed 5 years.
In Boxing[edit | edit source]
He can box. Hit them with the 1-2 pew-pew shots. If you were to fight him, you would hear a bloodcurdling scream before you spine was forcibly removed from your body. Matt would then put your spine in his spine pit below his home, along with the other hundreds of spines of his enemies. At one point in his boxing career, David Failburg challenged him to a boxing match because Matt (who also happens to give his films bad reviews, just like everyone) tried to help him with his movies, since Failburg is ignorant and hard to work with, he ultimately lost the boxing match with Matt. The video of David and Matt boxing was uploaded to YouTube on October 14, 2019.
In Painting[edit | edit source]
Matt taught Bob Ross and Leonardo da Vinci how to paint. He then saw how much power Bob had to end his life unexpectedly. "F", said Matt on the matter
In Wii Sports Resort[edit | edit source]
Those that dared to challenge this man to a 1v1 duel were required to sign hundreds of papers so that the resort would not be held accountable for the following:
- Loss of every ounce of blood
- Sudden feelings of edit warring
- Surprise ass-eating
- Missing organs
- The desire to volunteer to help quench Matt's blood lust
- Uncontrollable arm flailing and enthusiastic dish washing
- Turning into a copy of Matt
- Blacking out, and proceeding to wake up in a cart with a man sitting nearby announcing "You're finally awake."
- Every organ in your face's position being shuffled
- Accidentally shitting yourself out of fear
- Staying in the water so long that they become a fish
Trivia[edit | edit source]
- Maka Wuhu was made from his massive schlong
- Approximately 12 asses are eaten every second due to Matt
- He is a feminist but also beats bitches
- He has the biggest penis of them all
- "He's pretty hot." -Elisa and Lucia
- Chad Matt is stronger than virgin Shaggy
- He Masturbates to Elisa and Lucia being naked
- He escaped from the hardest prisons ever made including Alcatraz
- He challenged David Failburg 3 times in boxing matches and won all of them
- His Butthole can open a soda can in 1 second, without him even trying. Those who have seen him do it are instantly clapped
- He taught Kim Jong-un the following: How to Drive, Speak French, Sword fighting, and Play Competitive Smash
- He beat Mew2King and ZeRo in a 2v1 Smash game while blindfolded。
- He created Undertale and has his own Megalovania remix, which is played every time you battle him in boxing or swordfighting.
- With his stare he can level a skyscraper.
- He has had a threesome with Elisa and Lucia.
- He has beat various other false gods such as Thanos, Shaggy, Moto Moto, Big Chungus and Shrek.
- Matt has destroyed tons of Baby Shark Merchandise and has disliked the song itself
- He is the secret president of Nintendo
- He kidnaps Akira and his friends in The Wuhu Island Movie: Kira's Swordplay Showdown Quest
- His design inspired Thanos, being the ruler of the entire multiverse
- He became a major target in February 2019 after it was discovered that he had every WiiWare game
- False gods such as Shaggy Rogers from the Scooby-Doo universe and Big Chungus worship him, even building temples to honor Christ
- He composed the Mii Channel theme and the Wii Shop Channel theme back in 2006
- He will establish worldwide communism but will still own all the worlds money just because he can.
- He could speak Python and Binary Code since birth.
- He is a big fan of Star Wars.
- He has showed mercy and compassion to people as God wants us to do
- He fucking hates the stupid bitches from r/mii_irl. Stop stealing memes and get a fucking job and eat shit.
- He holds the title for most asses eaten in two seconds, having eaten over 40 of them in that short span of time
- He resexualized Lola Bunny and got Pepe Le Pew in Space Jam 2: A New Legacy
- He currently owns the Infinity Gauntlet but doesn't wear it because he likes to dance to songs that require lots of finger snapping.
- It is rumored that 99.99% of Matt's penis is actually invisible. The 0.01% that is visible is not the full length.
- He invented the popular game Super Smash Brothers, but it was originally titled "Super Smash, Bro" and was entirely centered him on making cheeks clap.
- He has a total confirmed kill count higher than all street gangs combined.
- Matt is the last known living ass-clapper and binary code speaker.
- His phone number is 1-800-273-8255
- He has sex with Elisa and Lucia every Friday Night at the same time.
- He is known for committing crimes against grumanity™.
- Matt has committed tax fraud (thanks to help from Yoshi)
- He is pretty fucking epic.
- Matt respects women and views Padme as a sexual object.
- Matt has currently achieved 69420 Battle Points in Star Wars: Battlefront II.
- During a heated gaming moment on stream, Matt ate the ass of twelve viewers. However, the Twitch mods didn't ban him out of fear.
- Matt was the original founder of Electronic Arts, despite the common belief that it was founded by Trip Hawkins.
- Matt knows how King Crimson works.
- Matt collaborated with John nHentai to create the popular site nHentai
- Matt's penis is actually void of color. Only Elisa and Lucia have seen it. Anyone who has seen it was killed on the spot.
- He is the only being powerful enough to utter the N-word.
- He is known to frequently hang out with various celebrities, with the most notable being Bill Cosby, Harvey Weinstein and Kevin Spacey. It is speculated that he is the son of Dan Schneider.
- Matt has a certain rare medical condition where he will scream out the N word whenever he goes to any bridge in Player Unknown's Battlegrounds.
- He is an (almost) undefeatable champion of ass-eating, boxing, swordplay, Bowling, golf, football, basketball, cycling, and Mario Kart racing.
- He will make Gangnam Style, Thrift Shop, Sexy and I know it, and Party Rock Anthem popular again.
- Matt owns 420 copies of Shrek on VHS, all of which are signed by Cr1tikal.
- Matt has beaten Shaquille O'Neal in an arm wrestle match 69 times in a row.
- Matt has revealed in a recent interview that Tupac, Biggie Smalls, Eazy-E, and Snoop Dogg were the inspiration for his music.
- Matt operates a gaming YouTube channel where he reads off articles from r/Games in a cynical manner to his audience of gullible gamers.
- He defeated Moto Moto and stole Gloria.
- Matt suffers from PTSD caused by the various war crimes he has committed in Vietnam and Korea.
- He enjoys exposing Maddox121 for never taking showers
- He has ADHD.
- He killed Jared Fogle for raping innocent mii children
- His favorite trend was The Harlem Shake
- He uses Lenscrafters instead of Solidworks.
- Matt's favourite animes are VeggieTales, Fox News and Boruto. He's also the world biggest fucking weeb.
- Matt believes that Sans is actually Ness.
- There are rumors and speculation that Matt isn't actually black. Instead he is some white guy who became extremely tanned in order to be able to say the N word.
- Matt can solo the Dragon Ball Universe with just his peen doing the "trick" (moving his penis up and down)
- He has 448 wives, but they all disappeared except for Elisa and Lucia.
- Matt stands at around 6ft tall
- Matt supports vaccines
- Matt's favorite number is 69 and 420.
- Matt simultaneously loves and hates the existence of PUBG.
- Matt shot repeatedly 6ix9ine for raping a child.
- He is set to appear in Space Jam 2: A New Legacy as the starring role.
- Matt loves to talk shit about Liberty Mutual, Vrbo, GoDaddy, YouTube Premium, and Raid: Shadow Legends
- Matt Proudly hates Pinkfong.
- Matt plays 5th dimensional chess on a daily basis.
- Matt wants you to buy his legit supplies to make your penis 69 times bigger
- He claims to be communist so that he can keep all of the money in the world
- He once fucked Elisa and Lucia for 69 hours.
- He encourages Elisa to do workouts to become Dummy THICC
- He killed Amber Heard for abusing Johnny Depp and getting away with it
- Can't tie his own fucking shoes lol.
- Matt was supposed to appear in Mortal Kombat, but was cut, due the fact that he is not mortal.
- He's never lost the Fox-Marth matchup
Matt's Son and Wife[edit | edit source]
Sometime before moving to Wuhu Island, Matt had a wife named Elisa. He had gotten her pregnant and fully paid child support with Elisa. She had died giving birth and the child Matt ended up marrying Lucia a year after her death. Elisa's ashes were spread into the same ocean that surrounds Wuhu Island.
Matt's Child, Abel, was a gifted child due to sharing the same god status as Matt.
Daniel had expressed interest and tennis and boxing, and wanted to be just like his dad. At the age of 19, he pursued a career as a tennis player, before going missing in 2018 only a few years after his rise to fame. Searches have been conducted to as far out as Board Game Island. Little did they know, he had moved to Wuhu Island to pursue his father.
- It is important to note that since he is the child of Matt, he shares the same God status as his father does, although he is significantly weaker.
- He says the N-Word in every sentence, even if it doesn't make sense.
"I'm that nibba!" - Matt's Child.
However, Daniel was not Matt's only child. Matt had another child named Guest B, who ruled the island as a totalitarian dictator for many years, even starting a civil war on Wuhu Island, before Matt killed him and took his place, becoming the rightful leader of Wuhu Island
Matt's Cameo in Space Jam 2: A New Legacy[edit | edit source]
An Image of Matt challenging the Looney Tunes characters to a basketball game to help LeBron James. The film was postponed to July 15, 2022 because he convinced director Malcolm D. Lee to resexualize Lola Bunny and to keep Pepe Le Pew in the film.